Few movie series have left the same mark on me as The Lord of the Rings. I can still remember sitting in the theater for The Return of the King, captivated by how the trilogy was coming to an end. Since that time, there have been countless long nights, re-watching those films, and even playing the The Lord of the Rings version of Risk at family holidays. Now that I am a therapist, I see so many parallels between the films and the work I do.
The Importance of an Alliance
As the films progress, a team of unlikely heroes travel through rugged and hostile terrain, with the mission of destroying the One Ring and saving Middle Earth. Each character brings their own strengths and weaknesses to the Fellowship; one cannot exist without the other. Gimli has such heart and willingness to fight, but is often slow and stubborn; Legolas, with deadly accuracy on the bow and arrow, flashes with moments of doubting the mission; and Frodo exudes such courage but is constantly burdened with temptation from the One Ring. I see the therapy process as quite similar. My clients bring an array of internal strengths (which they often struggle to see at first) but are weary with pains that are difficult to shoulder alone. I offer to ‘team up’ with my clients and work towards a common goal of mental and emotional freedom.
Acceptance
Oftentimes in the therapy journey, when no answers seem evident and no change is happening, I will include the concept of radical acceptance: this is not how life is ‘supposed to go’ or ‘how it should be,’ but it is right here in this moment. One of my favorite quotes from the series comes from the first film, The Fellowship of the Ring, when Frodo is lamenting his burden to the wizard Gandalf.
Frodo: “I wish the ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened.”
Gandalf: “So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.”
(The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King)
The Richness of Human Experience
When Gandalf, waiting at the sea to depart Middle Earth (at the end of the third film), turns to his comrades and encourages them not to weep, as “not all tears are evil,” he speaks of a truth to how ending therapy must feel for many. Frodo, having returned from his epic journey, to reflect on his physical and emotional scars, speaks of a similar sentiment that many clients have begun therapy with: “There are some things that time cannot mend, some hurts that go too deep that have taken hold.” (The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King)
Just as the films are filled with complex relationships, life and death, and a search for purpose and meaning, I truly believe the work I do in therapy can serve as a vessel for processing these same tensions.
I would love to team up with you on your own journey to emotional and mental freedom. To schedule a therapy appointment with Andrew Denecke, or one of our therapists at LiveFree Counseling, please call 720.465.6180 or click here.
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King, Dir. Peter Jackson. New Line Cinema WingNut Films, 2003. Film.
